Living Together Before Marriage Is A Good Idea?

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Say you’re in a relationship.  Say that the two of you have been dating for quite some time.  Say that you’ve both had that conversation about where the two of you are “going” and the dude answered thoughtfully and didn’t wince.

Hell, say you, say me.  Say it together.  That’s the way it should be.

Let’s say even further that one day, maybe jokingly, somebody throws out there that you two should move in together; shack up, if you will.

Now maybe it was mentioned as a joke, but you begin to mull it over.  I mean, in today’s society who CAN’T afford to try to save money?  With the economy in the outhouse crapper the way it is, every little penny counts.  You can consolidate bills and best of all – you get to live with the one you love; you get to wake up in the bask of their glow and their scent.

All of a sudden, the idea of shacking up isn’t such a bad one.  In fact, it’s a good one and you’re excited, but there’s just that one hurdle.

How in Sam Hill do you tell your parents that you’re going to be shacking up?

Hmm.

I wonder if its just a Black issue or not, but has anybody else noticed how much Black parents REALLY don’t like the idea of shacking up?  I live with my girlfriend right now and I remember having a convo with an older Black woman in my office who got really serious with me about it and told me she didn’t think that any respectable couple would shack up.  She likes me though so she said she’d reserve total judgment.  Lucky me!

Do white people have this problem?  White people move in together all the time before they get married.  Hell, they even BUY the places they live in together before they get married.  I’ve always found that to be curious, no?  I tried to find it in the Bible and all (since you know les Negroes are tres religiouso) but I couldn’t find the “thou shalt not shack” commandment.

Slap me silly and call me Susan but I happen to think that the pros outweigh the cons when it comes to living with somebody you’re considering marrying.  For one, you don’t really know anybody until you share your space with them.  Trust me.  All of those little things that you don’t mind at their place – since it’s, ya know, their place - will drive you absoposilutely batsh*t in your own place.  But how would you know that?  You can stay the night 4 nights a week but you really don’t know what it’s like to live with somebody until you’re in a position where they’re not only NOT going anywhere, THEY CAN’T because they live where you live.

Puts arguments into a whole new perspective.  You’ll find out that it really IS possible to go to bed angry.  And even further than that, you won’t give a sh*t because you’re tired and in your house.

Good times.  These. Are.The.Good.Times.

I really liked Chic.

Even better, I’m guessing it can further cement your resolve to get married or go your separate ways.  Which if you think about it, could save the divorce rate in this country.  Though on the other hand, cohabitation has increased anyway so it looks like more people are just moving in together anyway.

Anyway, I put the question to you good people – what’s the big deal about shacking up?  Is it okay or should everybody have a place of their own no matter how much time you may spend together?  If so, why?

And why do old Black people take such issue with the shackin’?  They know what we’re doing anyway…

 
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